How do you leave a church?

People constantly leave churches.

Sometimes they get transferred or move house.

Other times they are upset or just plain tired of a certain style.

There are a multitude of reasons.

Here’s my advice on leaving a church:

How do you leave church

1. If your move is not due to work or moving house … think again. Why are you moving church? What’s the motive? Is it a healthy move?

2. Be polite & personable enough to tell your pastor in person via a phone call, catch up or personal note – never use email or txt

3. Send your pastor a thank you card – even if you are leaving with misgivings it’s healthy to appreciate what they have done right

4. Leave quickly & quietly


Got a story on leaving a church? Why not share it via comments?

  • Mark Edwards

    From a pastors pov….

    When someone leaves because you are ‘no longer meeting their needs’….it can feel like a friend has betrayed you.

    Its never easy when someone leaves, for whatever reason, but when they have left well, they can remain good friends.

  • Jermayn

    I think ppl get offended to easily when ppl leave.

  • Dave Q

    I think how you leave a church is very important. You want to do it as gracefully and considerately as possible. In my experience some people will understand and some won’t.

    I think the key to leaving a church is to do it prayerfully, talk it over with others and explain it to the Pastor to give him/her a chance to correct any misconceptions you may have. I also think you need to take your time in making the decision.

    Ultimate though, I don’t have a problem if people think they need to go to another church. My thoughts are that we are members of the wider body of Christ and not tied to one congregation for life. Like jobs our time at a particular church can have a use by date in some cases. The most important thing for me is people are having some sort of Christian fellowship, receiving teaching and have a place to serve God.

  • John Finkelde

    @ Mark Yep pastors feel the offence deeply & I agree it is never easy. Leaving well helps the departure significantly.

    @ Jermayn not sure what you mean but parting company can be offensive at times

  • local deli

    What if the person leaving is highly involved with areas of the church. Where is the limit on telling people they have left, shouldnt that person also get given recognition of the things they have done through out the church? Or at least notify people that it has happened – rather than assuming that person has drifted away?

    Being respectful and thanking the pastor is a must I say, but what about in reverse?